Pride and Entitlement: Hidden Obstacles to Personal and Spiritual Growth

Pride and entitlement are rarely acknowledged as central barriers on the spiritual path, yet they quietly undermine both personal development and genuine transformation. Unlike overt egoism, these traits often present subtly: through defensiveness, resistance to feedback, assumptions of superiority, or an expectation that growth should occur without discomfort. While they may appear as confidence or self-assurance, pride and entitlement ultimately function as psychological blocks that interrupt the deeper work required for spiritual evolution.

Pride as a Barrier to Self-Reflection

Pride is not merely self-regard; it is a defensive posture that protects the ego from vulnerability. Kernberg (1975) notes that pride—particularly in its spiritual or moral forms—serves to shield individuals from confronting internal insecurity or unresolved wounds. On the surface, pride can look like strength. Yet internally, it prevents the self-examination essential for personal growth.

Pride obstructs development by:

resisting feedback, even when it is necessary and constructive,

rejecting discomfort, preferring self-confirming narratives,

avoiding accountability, through blame, justification, or minimisation,

inflating one's spiritual insight, creating an illusion of advancement.

In each case, pride replaces curiosity with certainty. This stops growth at its root. No one can evolve while clinging to the belief that there is nothing to learn.

Entitlement as an Expectation of Reward Without Effort

Entitlement is the belief that one deserves spiritual insight, emotional healing, or life outcomes without doing the inner work. It often emerges from unmet needs, unhealed wounds, or cultural conditioning that equates wanting with deserving. Festinger's (1957) cognitive dissonance theory helps explain why entitlement persists: individuals cling to the belief that life should be easier than it is to avoid confronting the vulnerability of unhealed pain.

On the spiritual path, entitlement shows up as:

believing one deserves clarity without confronting shadow,

expecting transformation without discomfort,

assuming emotional labour from others without reciprocity,

comparing one's progress to others and feeling wronged,

feeling personally offended by life's challenges.

Entitlement creates stagnation because it externalises responsibility. If one believes spiritual progress is owed, the inner discipline required for growth never fully forms.

Why Pride and Entitlement Persist

Pride and entitlement are psychologically attractive because they protect the individual from vulnerability. For those who have experienced trauma, invalidation, or chronic powerlessness, these traits can function as protective mechanisms—ways of reclaiming control, dignity, or emotional safety.

However, what begins as protection eventually becomes limitation.

Pride protects the ego from criticism,

entitlement protects it from disappointment,

but both also protect it from transformation.

As Jung (1959) notes, spiritual growth requires the confrontation and integration of the shadow. Pride and entitlement ensure that the shadow remains unseen, unaddressed, and untouched.

The Consequences of Carrying Pride and Entitlement

Over time, these traits create a spiritual dead end. The costs include:

stagnation, as the individual circles the same patterns without awareness,

relationship strain, due to defensiveness, blame, or superiority,

lack of emotional depth, because vulnerability is avoided,

spiritual bypassing, using inflated narratives to avoid inner work,

false confidence, which collapses under challenge.

The greatest consequence is the illusion of growth. Pride and entitlement create the appearance of progress while preventing any real transformation from occurring.

Reclaiming Humility and Ownership

The antidote to pride and entitlement is not self-rejection but humility—the willingness to see oneself clearly—and ownership, the recognition that personal and spiritual growth are active processes.

Humility allows the individual to:

acknowledge limitations without shame,

receive guidance without defensiveness,

face discomfort without collapsing,

remain teachable, curious, and open.

Ownership supports growth by shifting the focus back onto what one can change: thoughts, responses, behaviours, boundaries, and inner alignment.

Spiritual growth requires both qualities. Without humility, insight cannot be received. Without ownership, transformation cannot be enacted.

Conclusion

Pride and entitlement are quiet but powerful barriers on the spiritual path. They offer temporary emotional relief but long-term spiritual stagnation. True growth demands vulnerability, accountability, and the willingness to meet life as it is rather than as we believe it should be.

When individuals release pride and entitlement, they open themselves to deeper insight, authentic connection, and meaningful transformation. Growth becomes possible because the ego is no longer standing guard at the gates of the self.

---

References

Festinger, L. (1957) A Theory of Cognitive Dissonance. Stanford University Press.

Jung, C.G. (1959) Aion: Researches into the Phenomenology of the Self (Collected Works, Vol. 9, Part II). Princeton University Press.

Kernberg, O. (1975) Borderline Conditions and Pathological Narcissism. Jason Aronson.